I Know Who Killed Me (2007) Review

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(More customer reviews)Brainy student Aubrey Fleming (Lindsay Lohan) disappears one night after a football game. She's found days later, barely alive and horribly mutilated. She doesn't recognize her parents or her name - she insists she's a stripper named Dakota. She goes home with Aubrey's parents to recuperate but is oddly uncooperative with the police investigation, claiming she never saw her kidnapper. She starts having strange dreams, violent flashes of an attack she doesn't remember.
This film has all the earmarks of a low-budget shockfest: pointless nudity, slashing violence, and dialogue that is so corny it's laughable. The script is so convoluted and wacky that when I wasn't covering my eyes from the gore, I was rolling them at the dumb things the characters did and said (the crew from Mystery Science Theatre 3000 would have had a field day with this flick).
I'm sure none of the actors will want to put this film on their resumes. Lohan doesn't put much effort into her acting but does wear an excessive amount of eye make-up and Julia Ormond (Legends of the Fall) is wasted as her long-suffering mother. The worst part of it is that the villain's motive is never explained (don't blink or you'll miss the perp altogether). "I Know..." has sickeningly graphic torture, the dullest pole-dance ever filmed, and a ludicrous plot. For strong stomachs only.

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Aubrey Fleming (Lindsay Lohan) was living the small town life, until the day she was abducted by a sadistic killer. After a frantic search, Aubrey turns up alive, but changed. She is missing limbs, but has gained a new personality - that of bad girl Dakota Moss. Her parents and the FBI think she’s suffering from delusions, but if Dakota is just a trick of her mind, why do strange wounds keep appearing on her body? Desperate and alone, Aubrey must now unlock family secrets to unmask a mysterious killer with a deadly obsession.

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Land of the Lost (2009) Review

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(More customer reviews)"Captain Kirk's nipples!"
...and if that quote didn't tell you the new big budget big screen "Land of the Lost" film isn't exactly directed at the Saturday morning TV crowd... I fondly recall spending those mornings in the 70's with Will, Holly, Dr. Marshall and the Sleestak, so when I heard Will Ferrell would be taking the lead I was content in the knowledge that the campiness of the original Sid and Marty Kroft show would be preserved. As fate would have it this preservation extends even to the cheesy theme song which Ferrell nearly performs in one scene...this theme song pretty much covers the series and movie's premise...the aforementioned characters, on a "less than" routine expedition via an earthquake and a tachyon gadget (this part is new) end up in a parallel space they call the "Land of the Lost" complete with prehistoric critters and lizardmen. Unlike the series they need to find Dr. Marshall's misplaced gadget in order to get home, this leads to lots of mishaps and sight gags. But as I mentioned, this is not your father's "Land of the Lost" this is a Will Ferrell, albeit watered down, but nonetheless, a Will Ferrell film, so as you'd expect there is overt crude references flying aplenty, including hot Sleestak-on-Sleestak action (not really on screen), nothing to cringe-worthy...although some drug and vague sexual jokes.
"LOTL" is bookended by a "TODAY" show sequence in which Matt himself interviews Dr. Marshall about is kooky space/time theories and then again later interviews a vindicated Dr. Marshall at the movie's end. Dr. Marshall is classic Will Ferrell, the pompous, dimwitted boob he plays soooo well, so you know precisely what you will get upon entering the theater. This time he is a nutty paleontologist who has a strange fixation on "Chorus Line" and comfort food binges. "Land of the Lost" is more "Elf" than "Anchorman", I guess. What is new here is the digital dino and big bug eye candy, not really the norm for a Ferrell film, more in the spirit of Ringo Starr's "Caveman" than "Jurassic Park" though (especially the cave-boy-speak).
The kitsch aside, if possible, "LOTL" includes some impressive sets, some true to the original show, like the Sleestak ruins and some less Kroft, but equally cool, parallel world Bermuda Triangle parallel world clutter ala desert complete with missing ships, planes and gas stations. Also true to the Kroft look are the Sleestak lizard people (one of which is voiced by Leonard Nimoy a.k.a Spock) who look largely unchanged, but I'd have bought a ticket just for them anyway.


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Comedic genius Will Ferrell stars as has-been scientist Dr. Rick Marshall, who gets more than he bargained for when his expedition takes a wrong turn into the Land of the Lost. Now, Marshall, his crack-smart research assistant Holly (Anna Friel) and a redneck survivalist named Will (Danny McBride), have no weapons, few skills and questionable smarts to survive in a world full of marauding dinosaurs, fantastic creatures and laugh-out-loud comedy!

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The Great Debaters (2007) Review

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(More customer reviews)`The Great Debaters' offers what great movie viewing is all about. Based on a true story, the film takes us to Wiley, an African-American Methodist college in Texas during the Depression in 1935. Inspiring, harrowing, and uplifting, the film gives proper transcendence especially during a time and place that didn't offer many breaks.
We are first introduced to Professor Polson (Denzel Washington), a tenacious idealist and poet. As professor at Wiley and debate coach, he hardly yields on any of his principles. Inspired by the man who is named for the heinous lynching, Polson tells his debate recruits that it was in Lynch's best interests to keep Black people, "Physically strong, but psychologically weak." It is with this explanation that we understand his zealous approach to his debate team, and why he makes their training so rigorous.
Entering the field are forty-five tryouts, of which, only four will be selected: two representatives and two alternates. Of the three who make it, we get to know Henry Lowe (Nate Parker) a charismatic and bright figurehead who is easily distracted by beautiful women and hard liquor. Joining him are Samantha Booke (Jurnee Smollett), the first young woman to join the debate team, and James Farmer, Jr. (Denzel Whitaker) forever young at age 14, but an ever resourceful scholar and son of a minister, James Farmer, Sr. (Forrest Whitaker). [No real life relations.] As he notices a romance start to blossom between his teammates, his resentment grows. As the one who researches many of the arguments Henry and Samantha provide on the podium, he is put on the sidelines both in terms of the limelight and the love light.
As you might guess, Wiley enjoys a certain amount of success, and the price of success is opposition. Polson spends a great deal of his time and rhetorical talent organizing a sharecroppers' union, much to the chagrin of Sheriff Dozier (John Heard) who won't have unrest in his sleepy Texas town. In one scene the Farmer family is making a trek by car on a rural country road as they pass a poor white farm. The children who seem so mischievous run alongside the car as they pass along, unaccustomed to seeing a "Negro" with an automobile. Perhaps distracted by the nearby children, he runs over a pig, and in a quietly intense exchange between Farmer, Sr. and the owner, is extorted of a month's paycheck. This reminded me of a similar scene in the 1980's movie, `Centennial,' and showed the contrast between a good film with a similar theme and a great one.
In another part, the debate team makes their way by night to their debate destination when they come across a truly horrible sight. What they see through the windshield reveals a mob of white men who don't like having their heinous deeds brought to light. Shaken, they each try to come to cope with their discovery as they often lose focus and courage in the face of Polson's opposition and the violence laid before them.
Always kept in check by their unyielding leader, the debate team holds out for all possible opportunity. Audacious but unflinching, Polson invites Harvard to a debate match. One of the master strokes of the movie is how the debates and their topics match the action that goes on all around them. Show and tell is mixed expertly for a meaningful movie experience.
`The Great Debaters' is a top-echelon movie experience. Although it is reminiscent of movies like Mississippi Burning, To Kill a Mockingbird (Collector's Edition), and Akeelah and the Bee it captures a fulfilling true life story in a way that doesn't feel like rehash or contain a wasted scene. (Directed by Denzel Washington and screenplay by Robert Eisele)

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Two-time Academy Award winner Denzel Washington (American Gangster) directs and stars with Academy Award winner Forest Whitaker (Last King of Scotland) in this important and deeply inspiring page from the not-so-distant past (Richard Roeper, At the Movies with Ebert and Roeper). Inspired by a true story, Washington shines as a brilliant but politically radical debate team coach who uses the power of words to transform a group of underdog African American college students into an historical powerhouse that took on the Harvard elite. DVD Special Features: Deleted Scenes The Great Debaters: An Historical Perspective. That's What My Baby Likes; Music Video.My Soul Is A Witness; Music Video Theatrical Trailer Sneak Peeks: Grace is Gone, Cassandra's Dream, I'm Not There, Hunting Party

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My Zinc Bed (2009) Review

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(More customer reviews)This short HBO film is based on a play by David Hare. It's a somewhat bizzare story of an alcoholic poet (Considine) who comes into contact with a powerful businessman (Pryce) and his wife (Thurman). The story revolves around alcoholism and whether or not it is a disease. As anyone with any acquaintance with this topic knows, this is often a matter of intense debate, and one that every alcoholic struggles with. As the story builds, there is some considerable suspense as the viewer is left guessing the motives of the characters, most notably Pryce. I thought the dialogue between Pryce and Considine was mostly quite excellent, and both turn in masterful performances. On the other hand, this is not Uma Thurman's best work but she is nice to look at so all is forgiven. There are a few excessively melodramatic moments and the ending struck me as a bit anticlimactic, but I personally found the film to be intriguing, and to use a tired cliche; thought-provoking. You see, the topic is something that is very personal to me and it literally made me rethink my position and look at it from a different angle. That being said, the conclusion is open-ended leaving the viewer to make up their own mind, and with something to contemplate. 3.5 stars.

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Adapted from renowned writer David Hare's bewitching play, MY ZINC BED is a searing examination of alcohol addiction and obsession. This three-character piece centers on Paul, a young poet and recovering alcoholic; billionaire businessman Victor who befriends and employs him; and Victors young wife Elsa, an alcoholic who has chosen to recover without the help of Pauls much-relied-upon AA meetings. The story builds in intensity as over the course of a summer, Paul and Elsa become romantically involved. The three main characters clash and challenge each others beliefs as they grapple with their own inner demons. With wit, drama, and pathos, Hare explores themes of faith, friendship, and fidelity with a deep emotional resonance that heightens the story from beginning to end.

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Mr. Bean - The Animated Series, Vol. 1 - It's Not Easy Being Bean (2003) Review

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(More customer reviews)This is a great DVD. If you are a hardcore fan then you should have it already. But if you are like me, who are just a huge fan of British comedy then you should buy this. Each part is funny.....the one where he goes out nature photography. OMG i laughed so hard.........
well just bye it

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MR. BEAN:ANIMATED IT'S NOT EASY BEING - DVD Movie

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